Midget sex pt 2 tonight
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
