Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
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