Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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