Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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