Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
