dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
