Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
can u get pink eye on your cock?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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