My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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