question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
