I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Randomize
