he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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