Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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