I want to stick my p in your. b.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Randomize
