I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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