just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
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