Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
it glows. i had to have it.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Randomize
