I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
You're a waste of cheezeits
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
