just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
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