In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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