if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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