quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Randomize
