We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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