Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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