Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
