She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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