we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
