I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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