Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
