Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
