real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
