Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
