At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Someone signed my nipple.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
