Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
