That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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