smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
