I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
