Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
COCAINE IS GR8
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
