so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
