Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
