North Korea, Best Korea!
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
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