Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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