It's Friday. Sex?
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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