If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
