just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I don't think brook has ever known best
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
