its not stalking. its research.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
