eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
