Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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