We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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