this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
