saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
