Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Randomize
