Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
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